Doesn’t it feel like January has been dragging on f-o-r-e-v-e-r already? Well my wallet definitely agrees with me. It’s like after grudgingly agreeing to handing each of us minions a year-end bonus, they like to get their own back by giving it two weeks too early. And we fall for it and think “Oh hoorah! I have lots and lots of money which I will proceed to spend on stuff I don’t need to impress people I don’t like!” (thanks Will Smith for the quote). And then all these Scrooge-y old farts sit back and rub their hands together, cackling with glee, waiting for the day it dawns on us financial lemmings that actually they’ve turned January into a very expensive 6-week month. Again. Year after year.
So, since we are all feeling the pinch, let’s enjoy our misery while it lasts and look at all the lovely things out there that we can’t buy.
All together now – wallow!
This is actually not the most expensive burger – the most expensive one (The Douche Burger, I kid you not) contains gold leaf, but this one’s got a gold and diamond toothpick. The extravagance of extracting debris from between your molars with a piece of jewelry…
“5 scoops of the richest Tahitian vanilla bean ice cream infused with Madagascar vanilla and covered in 23K edible gold leaf, the sundae is drizzled with the world’s most expensive chocolate, Amedei Porceleana, and covered with chunks of rare Chuao chocolate, which is from cocoa beans harvested by the Caribbean Sea on Venezuela’s coast. The masterpiece is suffused with exotic candied fruits from Paris, gold dragets, truffles and Marzipan Cherries. It is topped with a tiny glass bowl of Grand Passion Caviar, an exclusive dessert caviar, made of salt-free American Golden caviar, known for its sparkling golden color. It’s sweetened and infused with fresh passion fruit, orange and Armagnac.
The sundae is served in a baccarat Harcourt crystal goblet with an 18K gold spoon to partake in the indulgence, served with a petite mother of pearl spoon and topped with a gilded sugar flower by Ron Ben-Israel.”
Obscene! I want one.
But this last one is my favourite – civet-poop coffee. These cute little fluffums eat the coffee beans then poop them out, and then a clever man in the Philippines sells it for a ridiculous fortune, saying to himself “pasusuhin”… (yes, you guessed right. It means sucker).
My sister shared a cup with a friend at Haas Coffee Collective in Cape Town and described it as strong and creamy… my laptop is fighting with me so I’m not able to upload the photo she took, I suppose this one is the closest approximation: